Dear mom and dad,
You can finally stop bugging me about not keeping my blog updated. I am currently in the process of baking white chocolate cranberry cookies. The dough was delish. The first batch was burnt. The second batch I believe is underdone... but I am too comfortable to get up and check.
I realize that I missed the month of March entirely. Oops. I would much rather skip the month of February. Not just blogging. The entire month and everything to do with it. Why?
1. It's cold.
2. The term "wintery mix"
3. Scraping ice off of my windshield
4. Valentine's Day (except for the movie... that was pretty good)
5. Winter clothes
6. So many other reasons I don't even remember because I have blocked all Februarys from my memory.
ANYWAY.
I ran the Eisenhower Marathon this weekend in Abilene, KS. Today at my internship, a patient asked what goes through your mind for 26.2 entire miles. Here is my breakdown...
1. Man, I'm glad we made it out of that porta potty line in time!
2. That's my cousin! (She was handing out water at a water station)
3. I wonder if we made a wrong turn? (The route through the park was a bit questionable)
4. What a pretty sunrise! (I actually said this out loud to Laura... she doesn't recall)
5. Look at that guy wearing the all lime green outfit. He's speedwalking.
6. I'm feeling pretty good! Hopefully it lasts another 20 miles...
7. The half marathoners are turning around now. I'm jealous.
8. It is a really nice day outside! (Or... It's was too cold, hot, wet, windy, etc.)
9. This breeze is nice, but I hope it doesn't pick up too much.
10. Hey mom and dad! (And sister and grandma and grandpa and aunt and uncle and dog and Laura's mom and Laura's boyfriend...)
11. "Rain makes corn. Corn makes whiskey. Whiskey makes my baby... feel a little frisky." (Lyrics that made me embarrassed to be a country fan... until I two-stepped to it.)
12. I wish we had our running games (we are planning to make portable games for long distance runners. Who doesn't want to play Apples to Apples mid stride?)
13. Shouldn't we be turning around here pretty soon?
14. Good, over halfway done! Oh... only halfway done...
15. There's our cheering section again! Is this a smile or a grimace?
16. Only 10 miles to go. Oh, and .2. NEVER underestimate the .2.
17. (Rap music blares) - Laura: "Was that my mom's car?" (We pass. Rap music fades.) - Laura: "It definitely was..."
18. Hmmm, my calves kind of hurt. So do my arches. And my thighs. And my toes. And my knees. And...
19. "I'm so much cooler online. Yea, I'm cooler onliiiiine!"
20. Stop taking pictures! I hope they all turn out blurry. This is blackmail material...
21. Just a quick 5 miles left. I run 5 miles on an easy day so this should be easy, right?
22. Wrong.
23. Speaking of wrong, this mile marker (23) was where the 22 mile marker should have been. Which led to my thoughts at mile 24...
24. Yes, that cone coming up is 25! One mile to go! Wait a second... that looks kind of like a 4. Holy mackerel. (Looking around) Does anyone else think we ran an extra mile somewhere along there? Anyone else outraged? No? Guess I'll just keep running then.
25. Dear fellow marathoners, It is not cool to jog back on the course as a "cooldown" and "cheer on" runners who are still finishing. No I don't think you're cool. No I'm not impressed that you finished before I did. No you are not motivating me to finish. Please leave me to shuffle my way to the finish line alone. Sincerely, me and every other runner that passed you.
26. Somehow, this mile seems to be taking longer than all of the others combined. I'm not sure if my feet are even getting off the ground anymore.
.2 I'm sprinting! I see the finish and I'm sprinting! (To onlookers this looks somewhat like a slow motion video of a person's first run. This may be the one and only time it is appropriate to yell something along the lines of "Run Forrest! Run!")
So that's the breakdown. No seriously, that's it. Brain function slowly deteriorates throughout the run until at the finish, all you can manage to mumble is one syllable words (or non-words...) "Wa." "Ouch." "Feet." "Done." "Sit." And for this, I apologize to anyone who had to attempt to speak with me after the race. Or after any race.
And while I'm at it, I should probably apologize to that lady who I passed once at the end of a fun run 5K who was pushing a stroller. I just couldn't let someone pushing a stroller pass me. According to my running partner Joel, my all out sprint at the finish was inappropriate in the situation. He was wearing a Bleaker outfit though, so I don't give his opinions on the situation too much credit...